eric-the-f***-p.

From a Chicagoan to Mitt Romney: Fuck you.

Fuck you, Mitt Romney.

Chicago will never accept you. You’re a piece of shit.

You want some divisive anger and hate? Here’s some:

Take a trip on your fucking car elevator and eat a four course meal of ape cocks, dog shit, human shit and clean your palate with a warmed up glass of stale stairway piss. Then brush your teeth with a toothbrush made of Shelden Adelson’s pubic hairs. Take a nap on a bed of nails you fuckface.

Also, I’m pretty sure that “liberal havens” like California, Richmond, New York City, Massachusetts (ESPECIALLY THEM) share this sentiment. 

Your fuckhole party is bitter because you can’t have us. You might get governor seats. You still get congressmen. But you’re still beholden to the dirty liberals that inhabit these places. 

We have the populations and we carry whole states for the democrats. So you cry about it because you can’t chip our gates and claim victimization that there’s a liberal agenda against you. No. There’s a “we wish you would eat bricks” agenda against you and your party, shitface.

And keep Chicago’s name out of your fucking mouth. You know nothing about Chicago and the second you could get a chance of winning Illinois by coming to our beautiful city, we would chase you downstate so fast you’ll go back in time.

And release you goddamn taxes. You’re no special than anybody else, Scrooge McDuck. And run on your record as governor of Massachusetts so we can point out how it took a Democratic governor to clean up your bullshit.

I just had a run in with the roughest looking “this can’t be life” looking ass pigeon ever. I wanted to run a comb through his feathers, man.

Lil mugg did the pigeon walk beside me and just sat down. I just stared at him. He stared back because he didn’t give a shit. He wasn’t even scared. I finished my cigarette and looked at him. I swear nigga said “lifes rough man. I don’t even know where to begin…”

I said “I’m out” and kept walking.